Week 3: Threats to Marriage
As a general rule, I am not an argumentative person. I
didn’t join the debate team in high school, I don’t like contention, and I rarely
take the “devils advocate’ position on things.
That is not to say that I am without an opinion.
I believe in God. I believe in Jesus Christ. And I believe
that “Gender is an essential characteristic of individual premortal, mortal and
eternal identity and purpose.”[1]
The topic of Same -Sex Attraction can be a tricky one to
discuss with people of differing opinions. The media tends to rip apart anyone
who tries to support marriage as an institution between only one man and one
woman. It can be hard to stand up for truth when you know that no matter what
you say, the opposing person will not agree. But as President Russel M. Nelson
has said, “Many of your neighbors, colleagues, and friends will have never
heard logical and inspired truths about the importance of marriage as God
Himself defined it. You will have many opportunities to strengthen
understanding of the Lord’s side of that argument by the eloquence of your
examples, both as individuals and as families.” If we believe that the family
is ordained of God then we must defend the definition of what God says that
marriage is.
I found it interesting that in the Supreme Court ruling of
Obergegell v Hodges, one point argued was that same sex marriage should be
allowed because marriage has existed for millennia and across civilizations and
is therefore a tradition. But where did that traditional come from? What was
the starting point of a man and a woman joining together?
Adam and Eve. Marriage was created and sanctified by God the
Father.
.
Four additional points were mentioned as reasons for making
same sex marriages legal:
- · the right to personal choice regarding marriage is inherent in the concept of individual autonomy.
- · the right to marry is fundamental because it supports a two-person union unlike any other in its importance to the committed individuals.
- · it safeguards children and families and thus draws meaning from related rights of childrearing, procreation, and education.
- · marriage is a keystone of our social order.
I totally agree that we all have our personal choices to
make. We have been given agency and it is a gift that we could not progress
without. However, that right to choose does not give the right to act any way we
feel we should without regard for those who shoulder the consequences of those
action. Particularly, children. I would debate the point that same sex marriage
protects children. The Witherspoon Institute posted a wonderful letter titled: Dear
Justice Kennedy: An Open Letter from the Child of a Loving Gay Parent. In this
letter the author discusses how torn she was growing up without a father. She
says, “When a child is placed in a same-sex-headed household, she will miss out
on at least one critical parental relationship and a vital dual-gender
influence. The nature of the adults’ union guarantees this. Whether by
adoption, divorce, or third-party reproduction, the adults in this scenario
satisfy their heart’s desires, while the child bears the most significant cost:
missing out on one or more of her biological parents.”[2]
I think that says it all.
As is usual with
many points of debate, there is so much
more that can be said. The point is…we need to say it. We need to approach each
other with open hearts and understanding minds, fostering an attitude of mutual
understanding. It is OK that we may disagree with others on this point. It’s a
hot topic.
As for me, in my simple, simple way, I defend marriage as a
sacred, God created institution between one man and one woman. But for those
who disagree, I will listen with love, understanding, and an open heart and
mind. I will welcome you into my home and invite you to share your thoughts
without fear of attack. You are just as much a child of God as I am. He loves
you no less.
